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No more Friends

No more Friends

Five years ago I happened to meet someone who was funny, sweet, smart, caring and loving. Not a single moment with her was boring or dull. We shared our own set of laughs and cries with each other, slowly becoming a huge part of each others lives. But as time passed by and we started meeting new people and friends, I was slowly losing my place in her life. I was less important now. At first I was angry and sad and disappointed. I confronted her, asked explanations. But nothing changed. I was heart broken.  I decided to keep distance, make her realize my worth and value in her life, but she had moved on.  Was my friendship worth nothing? Didn’t the moments we spent together have no value at all? Do people and priorities always have to change with time? Today, I have no feelings for her in my heart. Nor do I feel like talking to her or even acknowledge the fact that I even knew her at once. We occasionally become friends with someone whom we like at first, but soon start to become annoying. You don’t want to hurt their feelings, but you don’t want to hang around them for too much longer, either. And that’s exactly how I felt. She is still funny and fun to be with, but in front of others, all she tries to do is put me down or joke about me. Its annoying. My conscience kills me when I’m rude to someone or even have a fight with someone. But everything has a limit. I realized there’s nothing wrong in making it known that “I respect myself”. I can no longer let her put depress or hurt me. Have you ever dealt with such an experience? What did you do? How did it affect your life? People who treat others in a disrespectful way often feel insecure and try to make themselves feel better by making other people look worse. Don’t allow yourself to become a victim – and by the same token, understand that this person may need to be reminded often for awhile in order to break the pattern. Lastly, a true friend would never put you down.

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An article I liked..

When you face a difficult task, it can sometimes feel like you’re trying to move a mountain.The longer you stare up at the mountain, the more overwhelming your task seems. In this situation, it’s very easy to start procrastinating by finding other things to do.

Procrastination is one of the major obstacles that you need to overcome in order to make your dreams a reality.

The secret to overcoming procrastination is to stop looking up at the mountain and start looking down at your wheel barrow.

Let me explain…

When you look at a complex task in its entirety, it is very easy to become paralyzed by the sheer amount of work that you need to do. Your mind starts telling you that ‘it’s impossible’ and you spiral downward into a sea of negativity.

Mountain1

Mountain1

The way to overcome this paralysis is to change your focus and stop thinking about the overall task you need to complete. Instead, just concentrate on something you know you can achieve.

Mountain2

Mountain2

Let’s look at an example to see how this works in the real world.

Peter is facing the ‘mountain’ of writing a PhD thesis. When he thinks about writing a 500 page document, it just seems too overwhelming and so day-after-day he procrastinates and avoids getting started.

Each morning, Peter asks himself, “Can I write a 500 page document?” and his internal answer is “NO WAY!” so he procrastinates and looks around for other things to do – He takes his kids to school, goes to the gym, does the shopping. Anything to avoid the mountain that is sitting in his study.

Finally, Peter realises that the best way to overcome procrastination is to stop looking up at the mountain and start looking down at his wheelbarrow.

Instead of asking himself, “Can I write a 500 page document?” he begins his day by asking, “Can I work on my PhD without being distracted for 1 hour?” – his internal answer to this question is “Yes – I can easily do 1 hour”

Peter blocks out all distractions and works on his PhD for 1 hour. At the end of the hour he feels like he has made a small amount of progress. He asks himself again, “Can I work on my PhD without being distracted for 1 hour?” – Since he has already done this, he knows the answer is ‘Yes’ so he does it again.

By the end of the day, Peter has completed four hours of effective work on his PhD. He is tempted to look up at the mountain but he knows it is much better if he just focuses on moving his wheelbarrow one hour at a time.

After a month of following this routine, Peter takes a look at his mountain and sees that his 1 hour blocks of action have made a dramatic impact. This gives him even more confidence and momentum to keep moving forward.

Step-by-step, one hour at a time, Peter moves his mountain.

If you are currently trying to move a mountain in your life, here are the steps you need to take in order to overcome procrastination and get the job done!

This Weeks Action Steps

(1) Stop thinking about the overall task you need to complete.

(2) Instead, focus on a small component of the task that you know you can achieve.

(3) Ask yourself, “Can I work on this task without being distracted for 1 hour?”

(4) Forget about everything else other than working hard for 1 hour.

(5) At the end of the hour, ask yourself the same question again.

(6) Move your mountain one hour at a time.

(7) Enjoy the amazing sense of achievement that comes from completing a difficult task.

Until next time,

Dare to dream!

P.S: This article isn’t written by me. To whosoever it belongs, thanks a lot.

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After 4 years, I finally got the opportunity to visit Kerala again.. Since it was a complete family trip this time, it was extremely enjoyable. Since we had time to visit only a few places, here are some pics of places..

Kanayi Fields
Kanayi Fields

Athirapally Waterfalls
Athirapally Waterfalls
Athirapally Waterfall-Close Up
Athirapally Waterfall-Close Up
Vayanad Waterfall
Vayanad Waterfall
Mayor's Palace
Mayor’s Palace
Malampuzha-Sky Cycle(View from top)
Malampuzha-Sky Cycle(View from top)
Malampuzha Park
Malampuzha Park
Malampuzha Aquarium
Malampuzha Aquarium

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Happy Holi

Holi was pretty good this year, though I missed a lot of my old friends. After a good 3 hours of throwing colors and water at my friends and a few strangers and dancing to some great music, I got to have Thandai(a mixture of Milk,Sugar,Dry fruits and Saffron) this year. This was the first time I had tasted it and surprisingly, I loved it considering I just cant stand Milk.  On the whole, its always  great to have some fun with friends and family. 🙂

Holi 2011

Holi 2011

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Suffer from grey hair?

Some home remedies to nourish your hair.

Gooseberry(AMLA) is the best cure for hair fall and grey hair. Give your scalp a regular gooseberry paste massage to reverse the process of greying.

  1. Soak 10 to 12 dried gooseberries in half a cup of water overnight and strain it the next day. Use this as a hair conditioner after your head bath. Leave it on for 10 minutes and rinse your hair with clean, warm water. This will make your hair smooth and shiny and also prevent premature greying.
  2. A 15-minute, coconut oil and lemon massage is known to work wonders.
  3. Soak about 10 to 12 rithas and three to four shikakai pods overnight in a pint of water. Boil for a few minutes the next day and strain. Use this liquid as a normal shampoo on your hair.
  4. Apply a frothy mixture of castor oil and lemon juice evenly over your scalp and bathe after an hour with the shikakai and ritha shampoo mentioned above to reduce grey hair.
  5. Take one cup of strong black tea mixed with a tablespoon of salt. Strain the tea once it’s cool and massage on the
    roots of your hair. Leave it on for an hour and then rinse with cold
    water. Do not shampoo your hair after this.

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